Wednesday, December 17, 2008

He's Got the Spirit!

Sammy has developed a new dance move over the last month or so that is just the sweetest thing and cracks us up! He started dancing with one hand raised in the air swaying back and forth which I just love. The boy’s got the spirit! He has always loved music and so one of our favorite things to do together is to dance and sing. We turn the TV on to the Christian music station and just have at it. I think this his new move came about after one of my all time favorites- Avalon’s version of “In Christ Alone” had been on. I was holding him and we were dancing but then, as the song progressed I was just so filled with love and praise that I closed my eyes and really got into it, I mean belting it out (my poor neighbors) and it was a very emotional experience. When I finished I just remember looking at Sammy, with tears running down my face and he looked at me, put his little hand up in the air and grinned and then clapped for me. I talked to him a little bit about what the song meant to me and then we went on about our day. Ever since then though, when he hears music.. he lifts his hands up in praise! I just love it! It is a constant reminder of that precious moment we shared. Granted this video was taken after Kim and I pretty much tore my living room apart trying to take some pictures of him in front of our tree for Christmas cards. Totally didn’t work out btw as you can see from the mas chaos of my living room and the half dressed child. At least you can see one of my fav parts of him, his back fat, in all its glory. Anyway, we were in between scenes of our photo shoot and caught him dancing to the Christmas music.

Just for those interested… This song took on all new meaning for me at the Beth Moore conference that I went to in the spring with Linda and some friends from our Sunday School class. I had been dealing with some pretty hard stuff at that point and was really struggling, I was just broken. Beth had given an example of a woman who was going through the same issue I was and she made it through hers by clinging to the promise that God has for us in Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose”. I like the message version too, it reads “ 26 -28Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good”.

These words really were true for me, when I couldn't find the words to pray, He heard me and my "aching groans", he saw every tear I cried. Through Beth’s message I realized that I had been holding on to a little tiny portion of my situation, trying to control it and make the end result work out the way I wanted it to and I realized right then and there that God was telling me to relinquish every last morsel of control and admit that I couldn’t do it on my own. I prayed and promised Him that I would put it ALL in his hands from that moment on and that I would trust Him to make the outcome, whether it was what I wanted or not, work together for good, for good in my life. Then they sang “In Christ Alone” and let me tell you.. in a stadium that large with every person in there lifting their voices and the music blasting, it was powerful to say the least. I just felt His presence in that moment and knew that regardless, I had Him. Every day, for all the days of my life on this earth, I have Him to walk through it with and that is enough. He is enough. I was standing there with my sisters in Christ and realized that I had them, my family, and so many others to support me and see me through it and I just realized that life would go on, regardless of the outcome, and I would be ok.. actually way better than ok. I would be happy and full of joy and peace because Jesus would work it out for good in my life and turn this terrible ugly situation into beauty. Now that I am through that and on the other side, I can assure you my friend, he DID work it all together for good and my life is full of more joy than I could have imagined before.